Reclaiming Our Children: A Blog About Healing After Abortion

Recently, I was very blessed to present a webinar for “Be Not Afraid," an organization whose mission it is to provide comprehensive, practical, and peer-based support to parents experiencing an adverse prenatal diagnosis and carrying to term. My training, "Special Considerations When Providing  Support to Post-Abortive Mothers Who Experienced an Adverse Prenatal Diagnosis," focused on ministering to those who terminate pregnancy after receiving an adverse diagnosis and how it is beneficial for these parents to have their own healing ministry.

We at Lumina have been holding retreats for adverse diagnosis couples for about 6 years. They have always touched my heart in a profound way as I listen to the stories of these couples who very often were prepared for the birth of their child only to receive heartbreaking news of an abnormality coupled with the undeniable pressure to terminate the pregnancy as “the loving thing to do."

What appears to be sadly lacking in our communities are the resources to give these couples hope, and the means to continue to love their unborn children no matter what the abnormality or length of life. 

As one woman told me, “Looking back, I can see what was missing from the conversation in the doctors’ office.  They never mentioned anything remotely positive.  Surely there was something they could have told us that wasn’t bleak and morbid.  Like the fact that we could love our daughter no matter what her physical or mental condition.” 

Over the years, I have been privileged to work side by side with one of the founders of “Be Not Afraid,” Tracy Windsor, in our shared hope of being a sign of Christ to these couples, whether they brought the pregnancy to term or gave in to the pressures of termination.

In this season of Lent, a time that calls us to Mercy Himself, I am reminded of the unfathomable beauty of the sacrifice of Jesus Christ and the love and redemption found at His cross, a redemption that embraces us whether we follow Him without reserve, or give in to our human weaknesses.

Those who have chosen to bring their pregnancy to term surely walk the way of the cross in choosing to “Be Not Afraid," trusting in Christ as they embrace their cross and loving their child through its life no matter how short or challenging.

Those who give in to the pressure to abort believing it is the loving thing to do so their child will not suffer, also find in the end, the ultimate love of the cross, walking the way of Calvary to the only love deep enough to forgive and heal our wounds, Christ’s redemptive sacrifice.

He is there for them both, because He loves us all. As we move through this Lenten season, let us remember in our prayers and sacrifices, those who carry the cross of an adverse diagnosis. If we do not have an outreach, let’s try to promote organizations like “Be Not Afraid” so those who receive an adverse prenatal diagnosis are offered support in their sorrow, and hope of being able to love no matter what. Let us also pray that those who terminated will come to find the love of Christ on the cross that forgives, understands, and desires to heal.