Reclaiming Our Children: A Blog About Healing After Abortion

As usual the Huffington Post is filled with misinformation. A recent blog post by Fran Moreland Johns, "The Shame of Abortion?" shows there is a real lack of understanding of the very real impact of abortion on women. 

The author, a post abortive woman herself, believes the shame of abortion comes from outside of ourselves and states that the word "tears" at her soul. It is sad. If she were at peace it would not have that power over her.  But, sadly, instead of healing, she tries to justify and blame her feelings on outside sources instead of the real issue – that she participated in the death of her own child.

Ms. Johns attempts to give us examples of the error of our ways by asking us if the following people should feel shame:

“Thirteen-year-old Natasha, brutalized by more than one relative, is given another chance at childhood through an early abortion at a Planned Parenthood clinic. On top of all the trauma she has borne, she is supposed to feel shame?

Or the couple with a developing fetus they desperately wanted and loved, who decide to terminate the pregnancy later in its term to spare their baby a brief life of terrible suffering. In addition to their deep sorrow, anguish, and grief, they should be ashamed?

Or the countless young women in circumstances similar to my own: after choosing to end an unwanted pregnancy for widely varying, compelling, always unique, deeply personal reasons  because we are rational women in control of our own bodies — we need a shameful scarlet 'A' tattooed on our foreheads?

Words matter.”

Sadly, if thirteen year old Natasha did go to Planned Parenthood she may have had her abuse covered up as has been documented in other cases by Live Action. Most importantly, having an abortion will only serve to bring two traumas into her life: sexual abuse and abortion.

Aborting a baby does not take away the fact that she has been sexually abused. It is reasoning like this, instead of truly dealing with what happened, that is sure to impact Natasha for her life.

As for the adverse diagnosis abortion, I have worked with many couples pressured to abort because of an adverse diagnosis. As one couples stated, "It was quite plain to infer what the doctors wanted us to do.  The genetic specialist sat across from us with a book that she wouldn’t let us see.  But she assured us that in this mystery book was the one child that did actually survive to age 21 who had the same chromosomal abnormality.  Both doctors gave us the impression that they believed abortion to be the best course of action for all of us.  They couldn’t answer with certainty what exactly was in store for our little girl; they just knew it would be a life filled with pain.  Did we really want this kind of life for our cherished little girl?  Time was of the essence.  You see, I was due any day and we had to make a decision immediately.  I can hardly remember any details from the moment we left the doctors’ office until the fateful flight to Kansas where our beloved daughter was destroyed."

Again, the abortion only adds to the trauma of the event. Instead of allowing them to love their child for however long they are able, they carry around the guilt of termination instead.  

One thing Fran and I do agree on, no one should be marked with a scarlet letter and for sure there are many reasons why women feel they need to have an abortion.  However, no reason makes abortion okay. After over twenty years of working in post abortion healing I can honestly say I have met only a couple of women who wanted an abortion and walked gleefully into a clinic. Most women abort because they feel they have no choice.  Pressure from boyfriends, husbands, parents and society as a whole make them feel, for whatever reason, that it is the best decision.

Ms. Johns continues her piece stating that there is no harm to women from abortion. Perhaps she needs to speak to the women of Operation Outcry and Silent No More. They are the ones saying that abortion hurts, not prolifers.  As someone who was personally harmed and suffered for many years because of a past abortion, I find her denial insulting and irresponsible. Don't our feelings count?

Yes, Ms. Johns, words do hurt.  Words of shame, guilt, and the denial of the very real experiences of countless women who were harmed from abortion.

Be careful.  It sounds to me like you are part of the problem you are speaking against!