Reclaiming Our Children: A Blog About Healing After Abortion

"Our wounds and the wounds of others need to be treated gently and tenderly as a mother would tend her hurt child. When we acknowledge that we are wounded we need to be careful to respect the process of healing – it is holy ground. This wound is the place we meet Jesus face to face, this wound will be the source of transformation for us; this wound is the channel of mercy. The transformed wound is the source of light to the world.” (The Simple Path to Union with God)

This past week the movie “Unplanned” hit movie theatres. It is the true story of Abby Johnson, a former Planned Parenthood Clinic Director involved in over 22,000 abortions and post abortive herself. After assisting in the abortion of a baby in the womb through ultrasound, Abby left Planned Parenthood to become a major pro-life speaker. Unplanned is the story of her experience and conversion.

It would be hard not to know about the movie which is being heralded as the most important of our time and a catalyst for ending abortion. Well made, raw and heart wrenching it can change the hearts of those pro abortion or those who are sitting on the fence of “choice”. It also can be a call to become more involved in working to make abortion unthinkable; all good things.

Although it speaks to the conversion of Abby, her redemption and even the mercy of God, the film is proving to be very difficult for those who have participated in abortion, affecting those new to healing or still in silent suffering, as well as those who have been involved in healing for years.
Social media, articles etc. encourage everyone to go see this film. But, is it really for everyone? The reenactments of abortion displayed in the film have left many traumatized or re-traumatized from their personal abortion experiences.

In the three days since its release, many who are post abortive have reached out for help. Some are now experiencing nightmares, uncontrollable crying, emotional upheaval and a desperation to find some peace as they deal with the repercussions of the film for them. I would like to address some of the comments and experiences in order to assist those suffering to move past them and to help others discern if in fact they should see the film.

Don’t allow others to pressure you to see it.
With all the “must see” posts out there many who have experienced abortion feel as though they are obligated to see it. One woman relayed to me in her call that she felt a "duty" to see it. It is not unusual for a post abortive person to feel they need to make up for their abortion or seek to be accepted and please others. In reality, you can never make up for your abortion, but you do not have to. Jesus has done that for you, a gift freely given.

The truth is, you do not have to see it, and in fact it may be detrimental to your healing. It is okay if you chose to pass it by. Not only is it okay but in some cases a very healthy choice.

Most of those who have been involved in healing are already pro-life and are also familiar on a first-hand basis with how horrific abortion is. Just because you may choose not to see it does not mean you do not support the film, or others, or are not a “good” pro-lifer. Carefully discern, perhaps with the help of an advisor, why you are going and if it is the right choice for you. Give yourself permission after discernment to say “no” if you feel it would not be good for you.

Jesus did not throw anyone’s sin their face. In fact, He did just the opposite.
When voicing concern over the number of people impacted, a common response is that it is good for those post abortive to see the film, because it will force them to look at their abortions or push them in to healing.

The problem with this line of thinking is that you are forcing someone to look at their abortion from the side of Planned Parenthood and the evil of the act, not in the light of God’s love and mercy.

When the women caught in adultery was brought before Jesus, He kept His eyes on the ground in order not to shame her. The prodigal son was welcomed home with the mercy and love of the Father after years of sinning. Jesus humbles himself with the woman at the well asking her to get Him some water and inviting her to the living water of Himself.

It was love and mercy that converted them all not anyone else deciding when they should look at their sin or how. It is through His love, mercy and forgiveness that healing is possible and where the courage and strength to fight the very real battles of abortion take place, because you know you are loved by Him.

There is a lack of understanding for many, of the dynamics of healing and the deep despair and stress it can cause. It is hard to fathom the “hell” of abortion if you have not been there. For those new to healing, those harming themselves or those severely depressed, seeing Unplanned can be a crucial decision with very serious implications.

Through growing in relationship with God trust is formed by those who often were betrayed by those they trusted most. True trust in God and His love and mercy, is allowing Him to work in His time as each person is led to Him knowing that He knows what they need on a spiritual, emotional and psychological level. “In an acceptable time I heard you and on the day of salvation I helped you (Cor).”

As good and effective as this movie is it also has the potential to lead those struggling from abortion to despair. The actual abortion, which of course is horrific and takes the life of the unborn child, the very child of those struggling, is just the beginning of the devastation of abortion. After over 45 years of legalization and 60 million abortions we need to always remember that there are millions of women, men, siblings, grandparents etc., suffering from abortion in our country. Sadly, countless souls are lost to Christ, but there is hope. These souls are important to Him. He died for them.
For some this movie can drive them to despair, taunting them once again with their sin, even those who have been in healing. Unfortunately, the devil can even work in good.

If you are seeing it for answers to your abortion, look else where
Some who are post abortive have chosen to see the movie multiple times. There is a desire and belief it will end the scourge of abortion and even if painful, they are searching for answers within it.

While the movie may certainly help to validate the deception of an abortion experience, healing needs to come from personal experience with Christ. Whether it be individual counseling, or a ministry where you can learn about the dynamics of abortion on multiple levels, it is important to have others with knowledge of healing assist you in your journey to wholeness.

There are many wonderful post abortion ministries available now, as well as trained counselors and spiritual help. Seek out a resource that will move you through your experience into the healing God desires to give you.

 I pray this movie will change many hearts, especially those pro-abortion or those sitting on the fence. It is a great depiction of the workings of Planned Parenthood and of Abby’s conversion, but it is not for everyone. Carefully discern if it is for you.

As we journey through this season of Lent, it is a great reminder of where true healing and redemption come from. Abortion will not end because of a movie, legislation or anything else although we should always work towards those things. Abortion ends at Calvary, in the suffering, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. It is only there that we find the love and mercy strong enough to overcome death, including the death of the unborn.

The following are links to upcoming Entering Canaan Healing Retreats as well as other ministries that aide in healing.
Women
Men
Siblings
Adverse Diagnosis

Resources compiled by Silent No More
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