Reclaiming Our Children: A Blog About Healing After Abortion

There is a saying that many women are often socially aborted before they ever step foot into a clinic.

 Threats of rejection by boyfriends, spouses, family members and friends are often the motivating factors in making the decision to abort. Thoughts of abandonment and alienation by loved ones, often too painful to bear, make it seem easier to choose between those familiar, and an unborn child never seen, or belief that the child does not even exist yet.

 But, the reality of abortion often sets in, with birthdays never celebrated, hugs never given or received, anniversary dates, and an ever-present void filled with guilt, shame and grief.

 Social abortion however, does not end with the death of the unborn child. As “OK” as abortion is suppose to be, it carries a stigma. No one likes to speak of it unless it is in broad terms. It often governs our political outlook. “Pro choice” or “ pro-life” candidates are often embraced or discarded on their position on the abortion issue, but the personal pain of abortion is avoided like the plague. People are just not comfortable with it.

 I have gotten into “discussions” with some pro lifers who feel a need to remind those who had an abortion of the severity of their sin. I have seen the use of saying such as “abortion is homicide”, and “abortion is murder” do more harm than good. Many find it condemning and judgmental. I have been chided for speaking out against it, being told to be careful, I will “turn some pro lifers off”. Little regard seems given for the souls those words are killing.

 The pro choicers also seem to abort the women once an abortion has been completed. The denial of the very real suffering of tens of thousands of women experienced  after abortion is regarded as nonexistent, as if they had no right to their feelings or the pain they are living in.

 The media also seems to display the “politically correct” message, avoiding printing of research to the detrimental effects of abortion on women or categorizing underage girls who seek abortion as “young women” instead of the minors they really are. Society is left feeling they have no right to require a child who cannot get an aspirin without parental consent to get a life altering procedure like an abortion without their families knowledge. Or that full disclosure of the dangers of abortion to women is something that should be unheard of.

 The prevalent message still seems to be “we all know better than you…let us do this.” I have come to find that is not true. Women themselves are being aborted by both sides of the issue,  intentional or not.

 “Freaky Ally” wrote to me the other day. She is a 15 years old, distraught over an abortion her mother made her have. I kept thinking of Ally seeing the shirt “abortion is homicide”. I think it would be enough to send her over the edge. No one needs to remind her she killed her child. She lives with it each and every day. It is her baby that she will never hold in this life.

 I have also been told by some, that it is not their responsibility to guard speech for those who have had an abortion Perhaps they need to be reminded of the magnitude of people abortion effects. Everyone knows someone…everyone is touched…they are everywhere.

Organizations such as NARAL have carried abortion to the other extreme, as if the death of an unborn child is something to be celebrated. As if women joyfully seek out abortion.

 The taking of a life can come in all forms. Perhaps all these people need to still their own voices and listen to the voices of the many who are suffering abortions after effects in silence. Perhaps these people need to look at whom they are aborting in their hearts before and after the actual abortion takes place.